Interview With Shon Hyneman and His New Book "It's the Woman You Gave Me" - Part 1

Viktorya: I am excited about the positive feedback you have received since your first book. I will admit, the second book It’s the Woman You Gave Me, was not what I had expected. I really thought that it would be something along the lines of honoring your wife in all ways, including taking responsibility verses blaming everything on her. Please give us an outline of your book It’s the Woman You Gave Me.

Shon: “It’s the woman you gave me” is about getting past blaming others for where we are currently in life if we are in a bad situation. The book focus on our (and mine) childhood, single parenting, blaming our spouses and past situations.

After sin occurred in the garden and Adam ate the fruit, God asked Adam “what happened?” and the first thing Adam says is “It’s the woman you gave me” and since Adam made that statement (eve also blames the snake; ladies I have not forgot about you) the blame game has stayed on our tongues since.

Viktorya: Before diving into the heart of this book, I wanted to ask about the poems you included. Being a poet myself, I was especially intrigued with these. Please tell us why you included them and what makes the two poets special to you.

Shon: I added poems to the book to take a different approach to writing books. That will be the format with every book I write. An opening poem and a closing poem. Well, the first poem (the intro) is my son and the closing poem is my younger sister. They are both talented in the area of poetry.

Viktorya: Your testimony caught my attention like nothing else. Please shorten it and give us highlights of what brought you to God.

Shon: What brought me to God were a broken heart of a past relationship and the repeated cycle of women, drugs, alcohol and partying. It took me to depression so I called out to God.

Viktorya: You mentioned in your book “It’s the Woman You Gave Me”, how “music creates a powerful atmosphere in which the human soul can be inspired to act in ways it wouldn’t otherwise”. This is a very profound statement. It is very true. Music is extremely powerful both in a negative and positive way. Can you elaborate on the influence of music?

Shon: Music is a very powerful tool. For example when exercising , listening to a song that gets you excited makes you want to go the extra mile. If you are listening to music with sexual content, guess what you are going to think about…sex. Music should be monitored around children and pre teens because they will listen to anything as long as the beat is good regardless of the content of the song.

Viktorya: I like how you talked about a child seeing his mother being abused will grow up to think its normal until he is otherwise taught. Please elaborate on a man’s God given role in regards to respecting the women in his life.

Shon: When a man don’t know how to respect a woman, it’s because his parents did not teach him respect growing up; and the classic example: when the child grows up in a single parent home and the child sees mom or dad sleep around a lot and the child grows up thinking this type of behavior is “normal.”

Viktorya: What would you say to a man who was abused as a child and wants to make a change to better himself? Give him some words of wisdom.

Shon: Learn to forgive the one who abused him. If he harbors the heart, he will only damage the one’s he love. He has to accept the love of Jesus to change and move past the hurt that has happened to him.

Viktorya: Since I am more intrigued with relationships in regards to marriage, than any other, please tell us how a man who was abused can accept love from his wife and children. Please tell us how he can show it. What are the steps or the process?

Shon: He can accept their love by letting his wife and children love him unconditionally and let his wife show him her affection and respect. He can show love to his wife and kids by not letting the past abuse that happened to him regurgitate in his marriage and break that generational curse of abuse.

Viktorya: Being a single mom of two boys who don’t have a male role model (including their father) in their life, what advice could you give me in regards to loving them so they can grow up to be affectionate husbands and dads.

Shon: Get them involved in church programs for young men or get them involved in sports. Make sure that they see some positive men in their lives. Also, always tell them “mommy loves you” and give them plenty of kisses and hugs.

Viktorya: I love your statement “After all, real women want their husbands to be leaders.” Thanks for being a man who agrees with me. Now please elaborate on this.

Shon: A woman wants her man to lead. Not to abuse his authority over his wife and kids. I believe women want him to have a plan for his family and their future. Not to just work every day and hope something happens.

Viktorya: What is the best advice that you can give to today’s modern society dad? Speaking of the dad who thinks he has to keep up with the Jones’ and maintain a Godly home.

Shon: To tell today’s dad to get a vision for him and his family. With the economy and jobs that are scarce, he needs to map out a plan and follow through with the vision.

Viktorya: We hear enough about single mom’s raising kids. There are single dads who have raised theirs as well. I have an uncle in Michigan who raised my cousin since he was born. He is now 19. I have another uncle here in Louisiana who raised his three kids for the past five years, since their mom died. What advice can you give single dads in regards to showing affection to their children?

Shon: Men can show affection to their children by hugging and kissing their children. I shower my daughter with hugs and kisses so when she is older, she will be secure and not have to look for love in all the wrong places.

Viktorya: It was nice to learn that fathers are more involved with their children now than they were in the past, according to Michael Kimmel in Manhood of America: A Cultural History. Please give us examples of this.

Shon: I see numerous single dad’s at my church that raise their children on their own. Too bad these dad’s don’t get the credit they deserve.

Viktorya: Since I want to make this a three part interview and leave this with the emphasis on “the man He gave us”, please tell us what God given role a man must have in order to maintain a prosperous household full of love for his family.

Shon: He must show unconditional love to his wife consistently. When she knows she is loved by him, she will help make her household prosperous.

Please follow this link to get to know Shon and Londina Hyneman better.